GREED OVER GLUTTON

This great Georgia pollen overload got me thinking about warmer weather, and with it my lame wardrobe. I made things worse by stalking through facebook photos of my trendier friends, and so became quickly depressed and at the same time, overwrought with horrible jealousy. My logical brain wrestled with my greedy conscience until I came up with a master plan.

Mental breakdown results in master plan

Master Plan: We can redistribute our finances in such a way that I can spend more money on clothes. Allow me to elaborate. (And I'm sure this is the entire point to the financial bible study I've been attending lately).

I spend a very generous amount of money on groceries once or twice a week. Before my couponing days, I wouldn't even glance at the bill. I just bought whatever I wanted to eat. When I shop for women's apparel, I hesitate, contemplate, and heavily criticize anything that is not priced at least 50% below its original value. I spend many lonely, painful hours shopping, and usually return home without a single piece of evidence.

This double standard is the very thing that must be eliminated in order for my wardrobe potential to be realized. Clothes are of greater importance. At the very least they are reusable. Food is a momentary pleasure and becomes quite literally, waste, whereas clothing can be enjoyed and appreciated for many days years to come.

I explained this rationale to hubby. All we have to do is starve a little and I can have more money for my clothes. Simple. Hubby said he's glad my normally dormant girly-gene is still intact.

... so, if we eat only rice and kimchi for a few months...

THE DIY ITCH

I had a brilliant idea for cute little thrifty gifts, and I was going to make it happen... DIY / Martha Stewart-style for all my married girl friends. Get this. Wool dryer balls.

These dryer balls decrease drying time, fluff and puff clothes, and eliminate the need for dryer sheets. I mean, how easy was this going to be? All I had to do was make several big balls of wool and give it away as an eco-friendly, cost-effective, simple and ingenious gift idea which I would then be praised for being such a good and resourceful wife. And all I had to do was wind wool into a ball.

I happily jabbered about my clever and innovational gift idea to hubby as I settled down for a night of ball-making with my strings of wool. I began with the a small knot and began to wind the wool around it, just like in the pictures I found on GoodMama. 

This is so EASY

I kept thinking about how incredibly easy this was going to be. I was giddy with delight, completely sold on the genius of this idea. I was comfortably lounging on the couch in my PJ's. I was watching T.V with my hubby. I was going to wind this wool up into a neat sphere and barely even notice I did it.

After a couple of minutes, I frowned down at my little ball of wool as it disintegrated in front of my eyes. The more I tried to wind the wool around the small knot, the more it kept slipping off. The muscles on my left hand holding the small, pathetic ball of wool cramped horribly as my nails dug in for more traction. Giving up at this point was not an option. I shook off the hand spasms and began again with a frustrated sound of dismay. It dawned on me that maybe, just maybe, this wasn't going to be easy.

I managed to form a small, dilapidated, lumpy, oval-shaped ball. It did not look anything like the picture below.

According to the GoodMama web blog, you keep winding and winding until eventually, it's supposed to somehow, miraculously, turn into the size of an orange. Lets just say, mine didn't quite make it to be that big.

Here it is next to a delicious chocolate cupcake compliments of TeatroSweets

Here it is next to some lip balm

Here it is next to a Cutie. It is not an orange, it is a California mandarin

Not only did my fingers refuse to straighten from their gnarled positions, but my enthusiasm had petered out and died in whimpering fashion. Surely this couldn't be it! Surely I was doing something wrong here! I clamored for my computer. I googled and youtube'd "how to make a ball of string," but the answers did not reveal some hidden, secret technique. In fact, it appeared that they (obviously members of the Martha Stewart sisterhood) had no difficulty spinning their balls of wool at all.

I threw a small fit in front of hubby.

Then I proceeded to painstakingly, torturously, hand-make 10 more cursed balls of wool. I stuffed them into pantyhose material as I was informed to do by the Bad GoodMama.

I shoved them into the washer, I threw them into the dryer, and now that they are complete, I have lost all eagerness, all joyfulness to grant them as gifts. 

Cursed balls of wool

These labor-intensive wool dryer balls are sitting in my laundry room. I have 10 of them. 10. Please come and get them. That is all.

WE DO, STILL, OCCASIONALLY, GO OUT ON DATES

Restaurant

Canoe

Atlanta, GA

The Occasion

A date

Menu

Freshly baked sourdough bread, flatbread, and bread with dates and cranberries

Warm artisan cheese salad with bacon, baby spinach, dried canberries and a toasted pecan vinaigrette

Sage roasted pheasant with brown butter sweet potatoes, crispy pheasant croquette, and natural jus 

Slow roasted Carolina rabbit with swiss chard, bacon ravioli, sweet potato hash, candied garlic sauce

The Price

Regrettable

Main Topic of Conversation

A heated discussion on religion

Events

By candlelight, crawling under neighboring tables in search of hubby's misplaced blackberry 

&
Hubby's protests about wife taking a bite out of her own kind (wife aka bunny)

COUPONING ADVENTURES PART 1

Charmin Ultra Soft bathroom tissue for your tush, your spouse's hiney, and the rear ends of your guests. 

Also available: Charmin Ultra Strong and Charmin Sensitive. 

Paying less never felt so good

Charmin bathroom tissue 12ct double rolls

Store: Kroger

Original Price: $10.99

Kroger's Cart Buster Saving's Event Price: $5.99

Kroger Coupon: (Kroger.com) $3.00 off

Final Price: $2.99

Must have/sign up for Kroger Plus Card.
Cart Buster Saving's Event from March 6th- March 12th.

Excedrin Migraine (or Excedrin Extra Strength) for when your spouse nags you to the point of brain pain and neural disintegration. Pond's Clean Sweep cleansing and make-up removing towelettes for the complete emotional meltdown afterwards. 

Excedrin Migraine and Pond's Cleansing Wipes

Excedrin 50ct

Store: Target (aka Tar-ghetto or Tar-jé depending on the neighborhood)

Original Price: $5.99

Mfg Coupon: (Excedrin.com) $2.00 off

Target Coupon: (Target.com) $3.00 off

Final Price: $0.99

Pond's Clean Sweep 30ct

Store: Target

Original Price: $4.69

Mfg Coupon: (Ponds.com) $1.50 off

Target Coupon: (Target.com) $3.00 off

Final Price: $1.69

Read the fine print on all coupons and deals. 

Combine one manufacturer's coupon with one store coupon for especially sweet savings. 

GOING HULK

When guests enter our small, humble abode for the first time, their immediate, primary verbal reaction is something along the lines of: "Your place is so cleeeeean." On the occasion that our apartment is visited again, but unplanned or unexpectedly, their remark is then something like: "How do you keep your place so cleeeeean?" 

So the key element here is cleanliness, but my personal philosophy on home maintenance is: it's not only a matter of cleanliness (for I throw tantrums before dusting, sweeping, and vacuuming), it's a matter of orderliness (which stems from my innate need for power and control).

THERE IS A SOCK ON THE FLOOR!

My home is orderly, thereby producing the illusion that it is clean in the sanitary sense of the word. Everything has its place. Whatever it is- is organized and labeled into white ikea boxes and plastic ziploc bags, or placed into designated drawers and categorized on the shelves. In turn, I rarely "lose" anything at home, and I'm always aware of what I currently own so I don't end up buying things unnecessarily.

My white Ikea box fetish

For a home to appear clean on any given day, there are a few things I've learned about orderliness:

1) Don't leave today's clutter for tomorrow. Take the time to put it away because mess accumulates quickly. Do small bits of reorganizing and cleaning-up every day. Put things back in the same, appointed place every time.

2) Designate boxes (hopefully matching boxes) for like items (coupons, office supplies, writing utensils, important documents, loose photos, receipts, letters & notes) to keep organized. If something doesn't belong in any of the labeled boxes, invest in another box. I prefer boxes because they look pretty on the shelves and can be decorative while being useful.

3) Store most things away rather than putting them on display. When there is less on the countertops and bedside stands and desks, it looks less cluttered. It looks cleeeeean.

4) Maintain while cooking. When something is simmering on the stove or baking in the oven, turn around and contain the mess by putting no longer needed ingredients away, placing dirtied dishes in the sink, and wiping the counters. Just don't forget about the food.

5) Tidy up before exiting the premises. If there are a few moments (seconds even) before leaving the home, or going to bed for the night, put a few quick and easy things away, or gathered scattered goods to be put away at a later time.

If you are curious as to how I accomplish all this, please view a previous blog titled: OCD